Post-apocalyptic wasteland… ‘In the Lost Lands’ review

Paul W. S. Anderson tries to carve out his own epic sci-fi fantasy with ‘In the Lost Lands’, but it’s a mostly wasted endeavour when the story and writing are this lacklustre, ultimately proving a slapdash medley of genres and tropes.

Surprisingly, it is based on a short story by George R. R. Martin. Unsurprisingly, it stars Milla Jovovich in her umpteenth starring role for the director. She plays a sorceress who teams up with a drifter/hunter (played by Dave Bautista) to search for a magical power for the Queen of this barren landscape because… she doesn’t refuse anyone (her words). Cue lots of dull exchanges, characters that don’t matter, and all manner of unexplainable powers since it’s fantasy and the “how” and “why” don’t seem to matter. Truthfully, none of it matters. Even the simplistic is turned convoluted here, and the motivations of the protagonists are far from compelling.

The visuals cannot escape criticism either. There’s the occasional stunning image amidst its green screen-esque spectacle as events and action take place primarily in front of a sun-bleached or rain-drenched backdrop – while the aesthetic borrows elements from steampunk and Mad Max for some post-apocalyptic eye candy – but otherwise the performers don’t look quite right in the digitally rendered landscapes. Whether you don’t mind your movie experiences CGI-heavy or do, there’s always something more positive to be said about a film that does at least some location shooting before applying visual effects. What we have here is a director with a clear love of video games and a desire to create a whole experience looking like a video game cutscene. Like I said, some of the backdrops are indeed striking and lovely to look at but, crucially, they also don’t look realistic, whether you’re shooting a wacky fantasy film or not. Maybe an animated treatment of this story would have proved more beneficial.

Overall, ‘In the Lost Lands’ is another mediocre effort from Paul W. S. Anderson that takes a stab at fantasy, science fiction, horror, and western, but fails to make an impression at any. One action sequence stands out when the narrative isn’t stagnating with lifeless conversations and attempts to dole out uninteresting lore, but otherwise the majority of these shootouts are a choppily edited, generic mix with low stakes and no suspense. The 95-minute runtime is appreciated, but entertainment varies and a memorable, original epic this is not. The less said about the acting the better.

Score – 4.5/10

No fun factor… ‘Borderlands’ review

As someone who’s played most of the games, I had to watch this, even though reviews pretty much speak for themselves. It’s not Uwe Boll level of bad when talking about adaptations of popular video games, but it’s still poor filmmaking that does an injustice to the source material and lacks any sense of depth and fun.

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Raw cosmic terror… ‘The Outwaters’ Review

You don’t need to see to be scared. Nor do you need to understand. ‘The Outwaters’ offers the rawest jolt of cosmic horror you can experience… Fear of the unknown. Madness. Monsters. The abyss… I keep seeing the criticism that you can’t make out much once the nightmare commences, but those people are missing the point – it’s not about what you can see; it’s about what you can hear. (Warning: spoilers follow…)

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Descent into hell… ‘Malum’ review

When a rookie cop takes on the last shift at a decommissioned police station where members of a cult committed suicide years prior, she isn’t prepared for the supernatural grip that the cult’s leader has over the place. As the paranormal occurrences grow in frequency and escalate to deadly extremes, she begins to uncover the truth not only about the cult, but also the connection they have to her family’s past…

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Nature is unforgiving… ‘In a Violent Nature’ review

Two things are required for the arthouse slasher, ‘In a Violent Nature’ – patience, and a strong stomach. Because once a locket is taken from a grave by a group of reckless teens, something unstoppable awakens… Witness the wrath of a silent undead brute as he slaughters everyone in his path in an attempt to retrieve what was taken…

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Style over substance… ‘Copenhagen Cowboy’ Review

Nicolas Winding Refn’s latest is a dark neo-noir drama series with quirky elements and a whole lot of style to cover for its lack of substance. Fortunately, that means all 6 episodes of ‘Copenhagen Cowboy’ are gorgeous to behold even when the narrative is frustratingly skimming the borders of interesting areas to explore (and subsequently explain).

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The night HE came home… ‘Halloween’ (1978) Review

‘Halloween’ has since spawned a plethora of inferior imitators, but John Carpenter’s original classic slasher simply cannot be beaten. A masterclass of suspense building, chilling imagery, and iconic music produced by the legend himself, ‘Halloween’ shows what can be accomplished with a meagre budget when the right person is in full command of their craft.

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The Stars Our Destination… ‘Ad Astra’ Review

To The Stars…

Visually breathtaking and gorgeously filmed, ‘Ad Astra’ is a space epic that takes you on a thematically ambitious journey across the stars. It’s about an astronaut who must embark on a daring personal mission to Neptune in order to uncover the truth surrounding his missing father…

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